Vol 4, The VERY Grand Finale: Let Er Rip!

Inspiration, by its very nature, draws upon the influence of pre-existing factors: first comes an incident, person, place, concept or tangible item, then the emotion one attaches, and finally, the resulting artistic creation. When it comes to “studied” artforms such as music, most practitioners originally enter the craft by learning/mastering the works of others, before they begin to compose themselves. Accordingly, when the time for the latter endeavour comes around, the techniques and ideas of their idols with which they’ve become familiar inevitably end up entering into their own works; sometimes subtly, sometimes not so much. In other words, it goes without saying that every artist is influenced by someone.

All of this brings me to today’s topic at hand: that of “ripping off” the works of others. Following my longstanding tradition of ending each year with a controversial countdown, below I’ve compiled a list of what I feel are some of the hands down WORST rip-offs in contemporary popular music history.

But, before we get to the muckraking, I feel it’s necessary to point out the definitions of “homaging” and “sampling” to clarify that I’m NOT referring to either of these practises. Rather, my list overviews songs which have blatantly ripped off the material (ie: the song melody) of someone else’s in its near identical or precisely identical form, and attempted to pass it off as “original.”

Homaging:

Definition: the intentional AND importantly CREDITED borrowing and incorporation of lyrical, melodious or riff fragments from songs of artists who’ve greatly inspired you into one or several of your own works.

Aim: To give recognition, credence, “props” and/or thanks

Example: Veruca Salt’s bridge in “Save You” plays on the lyrics/melody/guitar work of Nirvana’s “Negative Creep”

Sampling:

Definition: typically involves looping a familiar/well-known rhythm/riff to act as the “backing track” for a new melody. May be intentional OR unintentional, credited OR uncredited. Primarily associated with rap and/or techno music.

Aim: varies, may be similar to what is intended to be accomplished through homaging, an attempt to rework a song with one’s own flavour (similar to doing a really different take on a cover tune like Chris Cornell’s cover of M.J.’s “Billie Jean”) OR an attempt to earn an easy hit single by capitalizing on an already popular tune and merely adding new lyrics and/or a slightly new vocal line. The latter aim is the MOST common. 

Example: Puff Daddy’s “I’ll Be Missing You” samples The Police’s “I’ll Be Watching You”

To play the devil’s advocate temporarily, I should mention it’s been argued that at this point in popular music history, virtually every tuneful/melodic chord pattern, annoyingly catchy percussion rhythm, and instantly memorable vocal hook has been pretty much done to death. Given all of this, some suggest that “true originality” is no longer possible.I have my own opinions on the matter, but I’ll let you all mull that one over for yourselves.

My theory is this: we have a limited number of major labels (and indie labels which are merely thinly veiled subsidiaries of majors) who run approximately 80% of the mainstream music marketplace. Said labels have limited songwriting teams working for the vast MAJORITY of ALL of their top-selling artists.

While on the surface, it appears there is a wide variety of different types of musicians/music styles being represented, when you have the SAME people pumping out tunes for everyone, it results in an extremely skewed creative playing table (musically, lyrically, and otherwise). Furthermore, considering the industry is obsessed with jumping on the “fad wagon” signing every band/act that looks or sounds remotely similar to whomever is currently topping the charts, it’s NOT difficult to see why so many songs/artists are becoming increasingly indistinguishable (in ALL regards).

Perhaps a business analogy would prove illustrative: when you have a single large media conglomerate that oversees the content of 100 daily newspapers, it’s NOT surprising to see that all of those newspapers will contain highly similar if NOT identical stories in them week-to-week irrespective of their location (barring extraordinary local “breaking news”) because it’s CHEAPER to merely replicate/rehash old content that you know sells than to either bring on new creative staff or allow your current staff to go out into the field, pitch their own stories and conduct hard journalism research.

It’s not, however, like this trend is all that new considering that for years during the beginnings of “rock’n’roll” (when it was still known as “rhythm and blues”), because of racial segregation and discriminatory legal and broadcast practises, white artists like Elvis got away scot-free ripping off the tunes of much MORE talented and rarely acknowledged African American players. What is new though is the rate of rip-off crossover between supposedly distinct “genres” and the instant popularity of “artists” who’d be NOTHING if it weren’t for clever marketing tactics which again merely rip-off what’s already worked in the past.

So…without further adieu and in no particular order, I welcome you all to listen to these tracks side-by-side and see if you can hear the undisputable “coincidences” (and I use that term loosely):

1) The Alan Parsons Project’s “Eye in the Sky” Vs. Lady Antebellum’s “Need You Now”

2) Bon Jovi’s “Dead or Alive” Vs. Aaron Lewis’ “Country Boy”

3) Seal’s “Kiss From a Rose” Vs. Chad Kroeger’s (feat. Josey Scott) “Hero” (*as noted originally by Shirley Manson from Garbage)

4) Madonna’s “Express Yourself” Vs. Lady Gaga’s “Born This Way”

5) The Beatles” “Ob-La-Di, Ob-La-Da” Vs. The Offspring’s “Why Don't You Get a Job?” (*pay particular attention to the choruses)

6) Rod Stewart’s “Forever Young” Vs. U2’s “Still Haven’t Found What I’m Looking For”

7) Tom Jones’ “Delilah” Vs. Fastball’s “The Way”

8) The Chiffons’ “He’s So Fine” Vs. George Harrison’s “My Sweet Lord” (*VERY famous lawsuit!)

9) Natalie Imbruglia’s “Torn” Vs. The Black-Eyed Peas’ “Where is the Love?”

10) Chuck Berry’s “Sweet Little Sixteen” Vs. The Beach Boys’ “Surfin’ USA” (*note The Beach Boys, at least, have admitted they are hugely influenced by Berry…perhaps because SEVERAL of their tunes have been accused of ripping his off)

11) Kelly Clarkson’s “Behind These Hazel Eyes” Vs. Fefe Dobson’s “Stuttering” (*no doubt they have the SAME songwriter)

12) Lillix’s “It’s About Time” Vs. Avril Lavigne’s “Complicated” (*same note as for number 11)

13) Collective Soul’s “The World I Know” Vs. Christina Perri’s “Jar of Hearts” (*most apparent when listening Sam Tsui’s cover of Christina Perri’s song as it’s in the SAME key as the original Collective Soul tune)

14) Joe Satriani’s “If I Could Fly” Vs. Coldplay’s “Viva La Vida” (*Satriani did issue a lawsuit. The case was dismissed... I suspect some sort of pay-off to keep quiet was involved.)

15) Astrud Gilberto’s (feat. Gil Evans) “Maria Quiet” Vs. Deep Purple’s “Smoke on the Water” (*being that the latter song contains one of the most well-known and widely regarded guitar opening riffs in rock history, this one will break your heart)

16) The Beatles’ “Lady Madonna” Vs. Sublime’s “What I Got”

17) Metallica’s “The Four Horsemen” Vs. Megadeth’s “Mechanix” (*Dave Mustaine was in Metallica at one point so it’s NOT really that surprising. Metallica too though have been accused of ripping off Excel and Iron Maiden, among others, which has caused some to question how they exactly justified being so up in arms about people "stealing their material" via Napster if in fact their "original music" regularly "steals" from others...but we won't go there.)

18) Tom Petty’s “Last Dance with Mary Jane” Vs. The Red Hot Chili Peppers’ “Dani California” (*Verses ONLY)

19) The Rolling Stones’ “Get Off of My Cloud” Vs. The Rubinoos “I Wanna be Your Boyfriend”

19) Muddy Waters’ “You Need Love” Vs. Led Zep’s “Whole Lotta Love” (*the titles themselves are a pretty good giveaway)

20) Jethro Tull’s “We Used to Know” Vs. The Eagles’ “Hotel California” (Verses ONLY)

Here’s one hell of a WHOPPER:

21) The Supremes’ “You Can’t Hurry Love” Vs. The Doors’ “Touch Me” Vs. Iggy Pop’s “Lust for Life” Vs. Jet’s “Are You Gonna be My Girl?”

And finally, the top rip-off artist awards go to Britney Spears (well, at least her songwriters) and John Fogerty for successfully ripping off THEMSELVES:

22) Britney Spears’ “Hit Me Baby One More Time” Vs. “Oops I Did it Again” (*as popularized by the comedy troupe SuperGirly)

23) CCR’s “Run Through the Jungle” (written by Fogerty) Vs. John Fogerty’s “The Old Man Down the Road” (*at least Fogerty got sued for his really lame attempt.)

Vol 4, Issue 10: Taking Centre Stage...Fright?

You know, I’ve been writing this column for hmm…let’s see about five years now, and it never once occurred to me to tackle this week’s subject at hand. It’s not that it hasn’t always been lurking on the periphery to a certain degree. Rather, I guess I just kinda took it for granted as something not really as relevant considering the “heavy-hitting” business-related material I typically discuss in this forum.

However, after contemplating both what I imparted and the responses I received in return at a special guest lecture I conducted last week among a group of young budding rock starlets, it dawned on me that this issue is absolutely one worthy of its moment on my personal soapbox, if only to provide reassurance to some of you out there.

And so without further adieu, this week, we shall discuss the phenomenon known as “stage fright”, the difference between “debilitating nervousness” versus “good nervousness” and finally, some tips for how you may combat your own case of “cold feet” and/or “sweats” when getting ready to rock. But first, as always, a personal story:

Long before I got into rock’n’roll, my dream was actually to become a broadway star – the next Sarah Brightman, in fact. Accordingly I went through classical and operatic vocal training for about 14 years.

Although I’ve always enjoy singing, performing, and speaking in front of audiences and never from an emotional perspective (even at the tender age of four) FELT anxious before stepping on stage, I used to be plagued with something I like to refer to as the “jitters”.

Basically what would happen is anytime I prepared to sing solo in front of a crowd, the moment I uttered my initial note, my legs would start to shake so violently that it sounded as though I was putting on a ridiculously over the top vibrato technique. No matter how hard I tried, I had no control over it and I got so self-conscious that I began to deliberately wear floor length dresses to all of my vocal recitals so that my leg shaking could not be detected by spectators.

This was something that actually plagued me for several years, but I couldn’t figure out the cause because as I said I didn’t FEEL nervous. It wasn’t until I formed my first rock band at 15 that it eventually went away.

But as we know, history sometimes likes to make a habit of repeating itself. And so, ten years later – last summer – and the first time I had performed solo in a REALLY long time, my jitters came back with a vengeance. Not only were my legs going haywire, but I found myself completely overwhelmed by the experience of being so tiny and alone up there on this massive stage relying on only myself to produce sound (and therefore knowing I was the only one to blame if that sound sucked!), playing to a crowd of over 500,000 at a major US festival. 

Now, before I go any further, let me just state for the record that harbouring a little bit of pre-show nervousness, in my view, is actually a GOOD thing as it means you’re invested in what you’re doing and you’re putting your heart into it. In sum, you’re nervous because you want things to go well. For that matter, I’ve yet to meet a professional who doesn’t claim that they still experience anticipation and anxiety before doing their thang. On the other side of the equation however is what I was experiencing (ie: debilitating nervousness): something that was affecting my performance detrimentally and therefore something I needed to understand so that I could resolve it.

After thinking long and hard about what was similar between my vocal recitals and last year’s festival experience and comparing how I felt before jumping on stage with my bands to both of the aforementioned scenarios, I quickly figured out what was missing and therefore what was bringing on the jitters: it was all about the approach.

With both of my bands, before officially plugging in, we always gave ourselves positive peptalks, did band cheers, and went out there with an attitude to have fun. 

Realizing that the live show medium is really more about entertaining people, than hitting every nice with perfect precision (if they wanted that, they could go listen to the recording), even if we screwed up parts or re-sang the same lyrics, if we delivered a show that got the crowd pumping, we weren’t too hard on ourselves afterward as we fulfilled the goal we set out to accomplish. Moreover, as you’ll learn once you get out there and touring, even when you commit what seem like glaring errors live onstage, if you treat them with professionalism in that you “just rock past ‘em”, to be honest, the vast majority of people won’t even notice. 

The point is this: because my classical training was so much about indoctrinating me with the concept that I was to sing every single note exactly how it was written on the page, I felt I had to perform perfectly or I’d be failing to live up to the “Conservatory” standard. This mentality carried over to my first few solo performances because it was established as the initial guideline for how I was to perform when I was all by myself on stage.

Don’t get me wrong, I have nothing against classical training – in fact I owe a great deal of credence to it for allowing me to develop the abilities I have today – however, the way in which it was at least taught to me created a situation where I developed a nervous reaction that served to affect my performances in a very negative way. The resolution? Quite simply, I had to learn to overcome my classical “perfectionist” mentality and to take on the positive approach I did when I was with my former bands.

You may think it’s cheesy, but I tell ya it works. Each time before I step on stage, I take a moment to find a quiet corner, close my eyes, and have a brief moment of zen with myself. I ask for confidence to go out there and do the best that I can.

Performance anxiety can also in part be conquered by making sure that you’re ready, by investing in practising (yes I know it gets boring sometimes, but it’s necessary), and finally, by realizing that with everything in this business, the best laid plans don’t always work out. In other words and in complete contrast to the above stories, I’ve been completely exhilarated to jump on stage, and 100% confident I was gonna rock it, and then what happens? Well, I find out the soundman didn’t properly ground the electrical equipment and so every time I strum my guitar and sing simultaneously, I get slightly electrocuted….I wish I was joking.

Let me leave it at this: we all have wicked shows, and we all suck really bad sometimes – sometimes it’s our fault, sometimes there’s something freaky out there in the air. As a musician, you need to learn how to deal with all of the above – not just deal with it, but deal with it like a professional.

Vol 4, Issue 9: Risk Management

The other day, I received two proposals from individuals “generously” offering to take over the reins of my career. No doubt my recent invitation to attend the 53^rd Annual Grammy Awards as a honourary guest artist had something to do with it. Although I’ve made it abundantly clear to my fellow players as well as several management firms that have approached me in the past that I’m confident in my abilities to navigate my professional aspirations and indeed have had success via the D.I.Y. approach, I was willing to, at least, hear them out. While I relay to you these experiences, I ask you, my budding professional artists, to reflect on why I had issues with BOTH proposals (gotta make sure you’ve learned something thus far!):

Proposal numero uno came in the form of a simple email and let me be clear, I mean SIMPLE. I received no personal introduction nor cover letter catered to my specific needs as an artist, but rather an attached text-only word document which consisted of no more than the individual stating his name, his age (not sure that’s entirely relevant, but okay…), the fact he’s worked on and off within the music/modeling biz for approximately 20 years, and three different service options he was willing to provide. Without getting into nitty gritty detail, the service options included:

a) Management: the lowest fee option, in which he got “final say over everything” (his own words). This agreement would be legally binding.

b) Exclusive Booking Agent: “all gigs and all event coordinators or bar owners interested must go through [him].” Again, legally binding.

OR

c) Freelance Non-Contractual Promoter: the highest fee option, in which you could continue to book your own gigs, but he would assumingly be able to get you bigger opportunities as well.

In addition to the above overview, it is important to make mention of a few interesting points of discussion in regard to his proposal. First off, he made the bold claim that, “many bars/clubs won’t hire a band that isn’t with a licensed Agent.” Considering my and many others successes as self-represented D.I.Y.-ers, I don’t feel it’s even necessary to point out the inaccuracy of that statement. 

Secondly, he made mention of the fact that apparently most of the acts he contacts elect option b (yes, believe it or not, he has acts he represents). 

Thirdly, he NEVER outlined exactly what his fees are, and failed to list any referrals, recommendations, or past clientele. 

His terms of agreement were not outlined (ie: the length of time for which the contract is legally binding would have been nice), nor was there any mention of an escape clause defining the agreement termination process in the event you or he was dissatisfied with the relationship and wished to end the contract prior to the completion of its term. FINALLY, and the point to which I’d like you to draw your attention most closely, irrespective of the option you selected, ALL monies were to be paid to him directly, and it was then HIS responsibility to pay you the lump sum after his percentage had been subtracted. If you don’t have a million red flags a-flying at this current moment given my last utterance, you should NOT be considering working in this business professionally. I mean that seriously.

The latter proposal fell much more into the “wolf in sheep’s clothing” category in that the party responsible for it at least attempted to metaphorically “wine and dine me” for a couple of weeks. We conversed extensively via email and over the phone prior to the development of any formal proposal. I tell you sincerely, it appeared as though they truly understood my ambitions and were willing to assist me in getting to exactly where I needed to go. They further made it a repeated point to make clear that they are a small but efficiently run organization that RARELY takes on new talents, no doubt as a means of drawing a parallel between their business tactics and my D.I.Y. ethos, and well, a little ego-stroking (ie: I should be SOOOO honoured that they’d consider me!) never hurts either considering most artists are pretty insecure given the exorbitant amount of competition.

Okay, so why did I go into suspicious mode when I received their proposition? Well, similarly to my previously outlined “friend”, there was no escape clause, no provided testimonials, no detailed timelines of when I could anticipate certain tasks being executed, nor were there any “legal” assurances that in fact they would fulfill the agreed upon expectations (to a better extent than I could myself) outside of their word. Yes, while this may have been a legal document, don’t kid yourself – the headache and money involved to take such scammers to court if they fail to live up to their outlined contractual obligations is far more than the average musician is able to even process, let alone deal with.

My biggest issue, however, with this second attempt pertained to its multiple demands for upfront money ON TOP of commissions to be earned on a per-gig basis. Not only was a flat fee of a cool $1600 (USD) to be paid PER YEAR (with a caveat that I should be “well positioned” to likely but NOT definitely have to pay it again in the future) in order for their services (booking, publicity, promotions) to be executed, but further, they expected me to shell out an additional 100 smackers (USD) just to have my bio and photo added to their website. I mean, I don’t know about you but if they’re supposedly “representing” me, shouldn’t that last bit at least be included?

Logically, yes people deserve compensation for their work. However, tell me would a smart consumer purchase an expensive vehicle, without conducting a test drive first? Likewise, would a well-versed businessperson overhaul their entire factory with new equipment without any warranty guarantees? I think we both know the answer to said queries.

While I’ve written extensively on the importance of protecting oneself from shady promoters and venue owners, I haven’t touched upon the topic of what a legit management proposal should overview, at great length. In sum, I hope you’ve gathered from this storytelling session that it is in your best interest to NEVER agree to an exclusive terminally-binding contract from anyone offering to manage your career that demands more than a straight up commission-based percentage of between 10-15% per booked opportunity. Two, NEVER allow said individuals to “manage” your finances. Finally, like anything else in this biz, do your research, ask for referrals, get to know exactly who you’re working with before you cross any “t”s or dot any “i”s.

Vol 4, Issue 8: Not so "Super"Sonic

For quite some time, I’ve reserved my judgment. But, when a service is purported by businesspersons as an “industry standard” and implemented whenever possible, YET that very SAME service has been called out for its illegitimacy by artists, I couldn’t help but feel compelled to dig a little deeper.

Let it be known, I have been a user of this yet-to-be-named corporation for several years – probably since I’d say around 2003 - with varying results. While it has allowed me the opportunity to achieve performance slots at industry bigwig opportunities: CMW, NXNE, The Real Radio Show and MEANYFest NYC, it has likewise landed me in falsely advertised “big break” situations that were neither worth my time nor the money I had to spend just to be considered…and trust me, it didn’t come cheap.   

It wasn’t until last summer, however, when I applied for a so-called “New Music Fest” hosted in the Northern Ontario region that I truly began to get suspicious. After being granted the “amazing” experience of playing to an empty room, restricted to the front left corner of the stage, while changeovers took place behind me and the sound tech was more interested in the bar’s offerings than doing his job, saying I was miffed is a gratuitous understatement. Don’t be so quick to jump to the conclusion that this pathetic performance circumstance was accountable to any faults of my own though; a great number of the other acts (several of whom have prominent indie followings in the area) echoed similar stories directly to me.

Now it’s not in my nature to be presumptuous, but when a festival is detailed as an opportunity for “exposure” for “aspiring artists”, I find it interesting that its promoter would host a concert with major headliners (which ended up being sold-out, by the way) just down the street, simultaneously. Equally interesting is the fact that the submission fees for said opportunity were fairly costly, and undoubtedly the aforementioned established bands had hefty riders. You put two and two together. 

Suffice it to say, after this experience, I started to get a lot more selective with the opportunities I chose to apply to. Moreover (and more importantly), I began to pay serious attention to the reviews left by other artists regarding various gigs.

From learning that festival rosters are frequently completed PRIOR to submissions being closed, to reading of several cases in which artists’ submission statuses have been changed to “not selected” for given opportunities despite NO evidence of changes in their views or audio streams, I realized quickly that I was not the only one taken in and for obvious reasons:

Its easy-to-access platform to which you can direct interested parties for a one-stop shop regarding information on your act (including your biographical history, audio/video samples, set list, stage plot, rider, tour dates, press quotes, promo photos) makes Sonicbids, the service in question, a simple, professional and well-organized tool for gig submissions. Additionally, its electronic nature saves bundles in terms of printing and postal expenses, and can aid in social networking. Finally, with a claimed “19,000 promoters and 270,000 emerging bands using the service, not to mention 71,000 gigs successfully booked last year alone,” it’s got a rep and it sounds impressive. What the above stats do NOT disclose however will equally warm the cockles of one’s heart…that is, if you’re a businessperson.

In 2009, Sonicbids shared $3 million dollars earned from submission fees with music promoters. As per Sonicbids’ “Promoter Terms of Service,” in order to list a gig opportunity, one is required to pay a one time set-up fee of $50, agree to “accept/review” electronic press kit submissions (EPKs), “promote” his/her gig listing, and provide Sonicbids with a copy of their venue contract/licensing agreement to ensure the legitimacy of their event. Further, promoters who host CD comp opportunities are required to provide a copy of the comp once it is released, licensors must notify Sonicbids of songs placements, and those hosting prize pack giveaways are to confirm their goods were distributed to their winners.

Promoters are able to easily recoup the aforementioned one-time charge by having NO restrictions placed on them in terms of what they wish to charge interested artists. While there is an increasing move toward providing more “Musicians’ Friend No Cost Listings”, in my experience, eligibility for these free submissions is often restricted to US residents, and the average going rate for submissions to major events (the ones that artists more than likely created their accounts in order to have access to) is between $10 and $50.   

In terms of payment, Sonicbids processes all submission fees (and covers additional expenses created by the use of their technology), and takes a varying percentage of EACH fee, before paying out its promoters. Promoters can also earn additional funds via “The Sonicbids Affiliate Program” by driving traffic to the site, thereby potentially increasing artist signups.

Okay, okay, so all of this sounds well and good, and fairly policed correct? WRONG! Here’s where all of YOU NEED TO PAY ATTENTION. There is NO requirement on the part of promoters to provide Sonicbids with proof of a formal business license, references regarding their business history, or membership in an accredited business association like the Better Business Bureau. Moreover, you do NOT even have to have any past experience successfully working in the music industry – literally ANYONE can sign up. So long as you pay your fee and “appear” to abide by the terms of service (easily accomplished if you select a single Sonicbids artist per gig and provide them with a somewhat decent experience), you’re good to go, as they say.

In contrast, on the artist side of things, it’s first off interesting to note that I was NOT able to find record of how much money was paid out to selected artists last year; I have a sneaking suspicion it doesn’t rank in the millions. Secondly, not only do artists have to pay PER the vast majority of submission opportunities (which as one may deduce from the above discussion adds up pretty quickly on your credit card bill), but further have to remit REPEATED fees between $6-$11 monthly or $50-$100 annually depending upon their EPK preferences. It’s also worth mentioning that gig submissions are ONLY eligible for refunds if they go into “overdue” status (ie: the promoter has failed to review the artists’ EPK before the notification date). I’ve heard through the grapevine that this is typically a tight window, moreover, that many promoters will update statuses to “not selected” on non-viewed EPKS simply to avoid having to pay back the fees.

The biggest issue I have with this entire process/system/site comes down to the fact that it markets itself and its opportunities as “reputable”, and is increasingly becoming the exclusive means through which artists can submit to certain opportunities. Submission payments are justified as part of a “filtering process” that supposedly determines which artists are truly serious about their careers. Outside of Sonicbids, another common excuse is that said fees cover the “administrative” costs associated with handling each press kit. To these statements I can only inquire, since when did having money to burn become synonymous with having talent and drive? Further, if one’s employed as an entertainment director, unless it’s a non-for-profit opportunity, wouldn’t he/she already be earning a salary to do just that (ie: direct the entertainment for their events)?

(As a side note, while I highly recommend reading the reviews posted below ALL gig opportunities BEFORE submitting to anything, this in itself is NOT a failsafe method. Existing users of Sonicbids will note that often said reviews are in stark contrast to each other, which begs the further question as to whether those espousing positive comments were somehow already affiliated with the promoter of the event.) 

All above quoted statistical and business history data regarding Sonicbids was derived directly from its official website and/or an interview conducted by Heather McDonald of About.com with Sonicbids Artist Relations Manager, Lou Paniccia.

Vol 4, Issue 7: Let's Talk Some Legal Shall We?

A few months ago, a close girlfriend of mine was offered a potentially career-changing opening slot for a major label artist in the GTA. Ambitious and actively seeking her “big break” like most serious indie talents, her and her band accepted the gig without hesitation…much to her later dismay.

Days before the “big gig”, the show’s promoter, realizing the band’s talent (and therefore also the potential cash-grab of the situation), contacted my girlfriend and began making extremely unreasonable demands on the act, including but not limited to a substantial cut of their merchandise sales, in order for them to remain a part of the show. Regretfully, but sticking to their guns (something for which I commend them), they had to pull out last minute; of course, their fans demanded an explanation…here’s where things become of personal interest to all of you:

When my girlfriend attempted to publicly disclose EXACTLY what had occurred (no more, no less) between her and the promoter of said event, the promoter began to aggressively message her and her band insisting that she had committed the crime of slander and that she was to remove ALL-related postings immediately, otherwise he would slap a lawsuit on their ass, thereby blacklisting them from ever having another equally potentially career-changing opportunity in the future.

This, sadly my friends is NOT the first NOR will it be the last of these sorts of situations because as soon as you start talking legal “mumbo-jumbo” with artistic-types, well it pretty much scares the shit out of most of us; accordingly, we’ll comply.

The aforementioned TRUE story highlights the centrality of two essentials one needs to wrap their mind around if he/she truly wishes to pursue “professional musicianship”:

1)      The importance of paper documentation for EVERYTHING

2)      The ongoing need for unionism

Let’s start with number one. In the world of business, irrespective of the industry in which you’re engaged, an agreement between parties has little to no likelihood of holding up should a situation merit legal intervention, unless it is in some kind of hardcopy format which reflects the agreed upon terms, affected timeline, and signatures of the involved individuals along with those of an objective witness. Now, I’m NOT saying you’ve gotta become a candidate for law school in order to rock out with the world’s finest, but you DO need to learn a thing or two about contract reading AND contract writing.

Many an artist, including one of my personal favs Aerosmith, has lost ownership over their own material (and accordingly have to PAY royalties in order to perform certain songs live) from being naïve and not crossing their t’s and dotting their i’s properly. Likewise, many an artist (myself included in my early days) has been granted so-called “amazing” performance opportunities with supposedly lucrative pay only to promote their asses off, show up with shitloads of fan in tote, do their thing, and have the promoter “mysteriously” take off in the middle of their set with all of the door cover charge cash stuffed in his/her pant pockets.

While the art of writing loophole-free contracts can be developed and improved upon over time (of course through trial and error), I am a firm believer that certain things should be left up to those who specialize in a given field. Without a solid foundation of not only the politics and business side of the music industry, but as well all of the legislation that could be potentially involved in a given matter, you likely will miss something. Lucky for you, back in the mid-1800s as the world was becoming increasingly industrialized, factory work prevailed, and instances of worker exploitation and maltreatment, not to mention a lack thereof of any safety or health protocols (all in the name of advancing profits) abounded, workers came together to form what would later develop into trade unions.

Not merely reserved for your parents and grandparents, or those involved in construction, plumbing and the like, professional entertainers of all sorts (from musicians to actors to even foley artists) have at their disposal their VERY OWN UNIONS which seek to serve the needs and protect the interests of their membership. Among one of the MANY perks that the American Federation of Musicians of the United States and Canada (our local affiliate being The London Musicians’ Association), the AFM for short, offers its membership is access to court approved touring contracts, free legal council AND emergency financial support should a “unfair treatment” scenario arise.

Considering that regular annual membership dues are nominal in comparison to hiring a personal entertainment attorney, becoming an AFM-er, if you’re ready to take your gig on the road, is really in your best interest and is something I’m not only recommending to you, but also strongly suggested to my friend (the one whose story I opened this piece with) after hearing of her all-too-common sad tale.  

The thing is, however, that unions are only able to maintain collective bargaining power and effectiveness in the marketplace if they continue to maintain/generate membership. Sadly, the young aspiring musician demographic, while growing, continues to rank low in terms of representation among AFM-ers. I don’t know about you, but I sure as hell don’t want to even conceive of how much worse this industry could potentially get without the existence of our union (read as: it’s already cutthroat!). In other words, here’s a lesson in protecting your ass and your future: join the AFM.

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Other benefits of AFM membership include its pension program, booking referral service, specialized insurance options, and immigrations assistance in regard to touring foreign markets. For more information, check out the AFM’s official website at www.afm.org or the official website of our London chapter at www.londonmusicians.com

Vol 4, Issue 6: Taking Care of Business AND Yourself!

It’s a mere two days before one of the potentially biggest shows of your entire career: a live performance and radio interview in Times Square, New York City. Your non-refundable flight is scheduled to leave early the next day in the AM. You wake up and your back is completely out of whack. It hurts to move your arm and shoulder (naturally the side with which you strum the guitar). It hurts to move your neck in every direction, other than keeping it stationary to the right side (which makes singing or any bodily motion, as you can imagine, quite difficult). Your chiropractic office is closed and there are no emergency clinics in the area that can deal with your situation. If you snake out of this opportunity, you know you’ll likely never get another one comparable…in other words, “the show”, as they say, “must go on.”

This, my friends, happened to me and can entirely be attributed to an injury I incurred several years ago, during my band days, from trying to carry five guitars simultaneously (we were in a rush!): a combined weight which exceeds my total body mass. Need I also mention, I’m only 26!

So what’s the lesson here? As a creator – an artist of anything – your health is vital as it affects not only your performance, but also your inspiration, motivation, attitude, and overall demeanour. Therefore, I’d like to impart onto you the necessity of taking care of yourself, while taking care of business.

Now, it goes without saying that professional musicianship and healthy living don’t exactly form what one would term the most “natural” of marriages. While the promotion of excesses in stimulation (both sexually and substance-assisted) is something that goes hand-in-hand with the r’n’r image (for better or for worse), life on the road, further, isn’t particularly conducive to optimal functioning.

For starters, especially if you’re touring the States as I primarily do, trying to find inexpensive places to eat that offer nutritious food options…well good luck. Because, in my experience, the typical musician is not that well-equipped navigationally-speaking, time is not a luxury that is on your side when you’re commuting from gig to gig. What this means is that if you find an opportunity to gorge on gas station energy bars and Red Bulls, you’ll likely take it.

The second major health dilemma that the touring artist encounters (ie: lack of sleep) is directly associated with the craft in which we engage. I don’t know how many of you have attended live shows and then attempted to go to bed directly afterwards, but trying to combat the ringing in your ears, not to mention the adrenaline that’s pumping through your veins is no easy feat. Just imagine how much more amplified (pardon the pun) these effects are when you are the one onstage.

Finally, the real killer…stress. From dealing with asshole promoters that try to screw you over, to last minute gig changes, to technical difficulties (which seem to abound!), honestly when you weigh the 45 minutes of euphoria you experience on stage against all of the shit you had to go through in order to get there, it’s doesn’t always seem worthwhile.

It doesn’t take a health expert to tell ya that when you combine the above three factors you end up in a situation where your immune system is weakened creating the perfect opportunity for the common cold (or worse, such as in my case) to take over. While I’ve seen many an instrumentalist “just rock past it”, it’s quite difficult to not sound like a drowning cat when you’re hacking up phlegm and can’t breathe out of your nose. Irrespective of your weapon of choice, I think the vast majority of you’d agree that when you’re feeling unwell, your ideal destination consists of a warm bed, with both Kleenex and a puke bucket on-hand, and a strict IV of chicken noodle soup and Gingerale, as opposed to a smelly touring van. The point?

Life on the road is hard and contrary to popular belief UNglamourous – there’s no need for sugar-coating -- but you can make it harder or easier on yourself by simply knowing what you’re getting into, and preparing accordingly in advance. 

If you don’t wish to find yourself with a bad case of the sniffles or having to face the reality that you’ve got a show you must play and you’re currently less than 100% mobile, I recommend you take to heart the following suggestions: 

1)                          Don’t overexert yourself EVER! I don’t care if you’re in a rush. If experience tells me anything, it’s that gigs NEVER start on time, nor do soundchecks. I was told by my chiropractor that had I not started getting adjusted when I did that by the time I was 40, I would have been in a wheelchair. Not cool or very “r’n’r” is it?

2)                          Pack nutritious snacks whenever possible, and avoid sugary and highly caffeinated drinks at all costs. Water, surprise surprise, can be quite the thirst quencher and there’s nothing like a piece of mango, or pineapple to give you that extra energy kick you need (without the risk of addiction or crashing!)

3)                          Save your partying for when you’re at home. I know many a musician that likes to celebrate their gig successes by getting trashed directly after. However, considering that there is usually little downtime from show to show, this means you end up in situations where you either have people driving while at least partially intoxicated (VERY illegal and VERY dangerous) or people playing while trying to kick an ugly hangover. Further, alcohol and other “substances” don’t tend to bring out the best or most sound judgement in people. When you’re crammed in a limited area for long stretches on the road, the last thing you need is an excuse to get into a fight.

 

4)                          Take shifts driving so that everyone gets a chance for some shut-eye. Further, spread out your gigs and always give yourself extra time (particularly if you’re crossing the border) so you’re never in a rush.

5)                          Get contracts (backed by the musician’s union to ensure legal protection) for EVERYTHING. You can never be TOO prepared as they say.

6)                          Plot out your directions well in advance and gain familiarity with your route (check for construction and possible weather threats that may require a change in plans as well); even better, get yourself a GPS.

7)                          Learn how to cope with adversity. Meditate. Deep breathe. Scream if you have to! Just find some way to deal with it all that doesn’t hurt yourself, your band’s reputation, or others.

8)                          Don’t pick up random groupies. No, this isn’t your mother speaking, but let’s be real people, sexually transmitted diseases are widespread (including many that have permanent or terminal effects). Moreover, finding out you’ve got a kid from some one night stand is so passé. Finally, it’s frankly dangerous. Being in a foreign locale with a lot of expensive gear on ya makes you an easy mark. There’s nothing wrong with meeting new people, and engaging with your fans, but put some limitations on things - keep your equipment in your pants.

Vol 4, Issue 5: To Perform, Perchance to Entertain

A few months ago, my good friend local bluesman Nathan Ouellette and I were having a debate on the way home from a joint gig. While neither of us could pinpoint a solitary definitive cause, essentially at the end of the discussion, we came to the conclusion that in a lot of ways, the “live music scene” is dead. As mentioned last time around, more and more once popular havens for mohawkers and moshers are closing down each day. While I believe this is partly a generational phenomenon (god knows I did everything I could to sneak into punk shows when I was underage, but that trend seems to have lost its appeal among the millenials), I also think it is due to the fact that the "working musician" has lost any sense of “professional” status in contemporary society.

Because of so called “advances” in audio technology, anyone and I mean ANYONE can cut a decent sounding record if given the right producer and enough Autotune, even if said individual(s) lacks in talent altogether. Add to this the “wired” state of the world, social networking sites, and video games like GuitarHero, and essentially you end up with a situation wherein everyone thinks they’re a bloody rockstar. 

To make matters worse, I’m not sure if it’s because we’ve become lazy, oversaturated, or too self-obsessed (perhaps a combination of all three?), but generally speaking, audiences and venues alike have developed a preference and higher regard for artists playing covers as opposed to those courageous enough to share with the world pieces of themselves.

*Come on, the fact that a glorified karaoke contest that weighs in more on marketability and looks as opposed to its contestants’ actual compositional ability is responsible for pumping out how many of our recent top selling artists speaks for itself.*

Given the above described current situation, how is one to stand out? More importantly, how is one to develop a following? And no, Twitter and Myspace stats don’t count – I’m talking about real people coming out to real gigs. Well in one simple phrase, you need to perfect the difference between “playing” versus “entertaining”. Perhaps an example would prove illustrative:

Last year, I was lucky enough to score floor tickets to witness one of my favourite childhood bands live in the flesh: No Doubt. While I was totally stoked to see them perform, I was kinda bummed that Paramore was selected to open the show. Now there’s no question that Ms. Williams can most certainly hold a tune, but their music quite simply just doesn’t do it for me. Despite this, that night Paramore earned my seal of approval for managing to match No Doubt in terms of energy, showmanship, and stage presence; something that is no easy feat. On top of this, I was impressed to see that they are a band of genuine musical talent. By that I mean, lipsynching proved unnecessary as they rocked much harder in person than on anything I’ve ever heard recorded by them. Taking into consideration their continued success (and the amount of people who come out to their live gigs regularly), I’m sure you can see where I’m going with this.

If I (or anyone else for that matter) is paying good money to see your act live, then it is YOUR duty to deliver the goods and give em a show worth coming out for again and again. Hitting every note with precision is impressive, but NOT merely enough. If I wanted to listen to the most polished audio example of a given act, I could simply pop in their overproduced album.

Live shows, though it seems some have forgotten in recent years, are supposed to be about an experience – one that allows you to feel intimately connected to the artists you’re witnessing. While a lot of bands rely on special effects and frills in order to turn their “performances” into “experiences”, unless you’re going for a gimmicky kind of deal akin to KISS, most of the time this sort of thing indicates that you’re trying to overcompensate for a genuine LACK of ability. So what do I suggest instead?

As a rock musician, the most important asset you can possess is ATTITUDE. Honest to god, it’s no lie when I tell ya that at times I feel as though half of my job as a performer is to also act as a stand-up comedian. Audiences come out to see bands live who make them feel as though they are, in part, responsible for how the show goes. In other words, it is all about feeding off of each other’s energy. If there are moments where you can directly include them (ie: clap or scream-alongs), capitalize on them and when you’re rehearsing, plan this shit out, in advance!

While being able to successfully pull off your sound live is important (ie: don’t hire a singer who’s tonedeaf or gets trashed before every gig so that you end up playing sloppily. Contrary to popular belief, booze and drugs do NOT make you play better!), it is MORE important, in my view, to be a true entertainer, even if that means you flub up in a minor way here or there. That, my friends, is being a musician. That, my friends, is being a PROFESSIONAL.

What one needs to acknowledge is that irrespective of the above-described less than ideal circumstances musicians are facing right now, the live show medium has always been and likely always will remain the most effective method through which to recruit fans and sell merch…that is, if it’s done effectively. I know I’d rather be told that I rock harder live than on any album I’ve released, how about you? In other words, if you need Autotune to sound “tuneful”, maybe you should consider an alternative vocation.

Vol 4, Issue 4: Going Grassroots

Last summer, I found hope in the oddest of places. Anyone who knows me is well aware I’m pretty set in my ways musically-speaking and that “the dark arts” have never really struck my fancy. But, there I was at a metal show in the basement of a burnt-out near-condemned hotel, finding myself inspired by the efforts put forth by a trio of headbangers.

Armed with a mere $50 to cover the cost of room rental, a homemade P.A., and close family and friends acting as both the door and soundmen, Presumed Dead successfully managed to not only put together one hell of an event, but also housed one of the most energetic crowds I’ve witnessed to date. Oh, and did I mention this was the band’s DEBUT performance?

This story is important for you to take note of because it highlights the essentiality of taking on a “grassroots” approach when it comes to maintaining a competitive edge in today’s oversaturated industry. Basically, the situation is as follows: with the recent closures of the once popular Embassy, Wick and Salt within our own local scene, not to mention Toronto’s 360 and Big Bop (among many others), simply stated, we are increasingly finding ourselves in a predicament in which we have TOO many bands, and too FEW venues.


The true kicker however is not merely the fact that these venues went under. Rather, it’s the reality that all of the aforementioned establishments once served as homes to up and comers providing them with a chance to showcase their abilities and establish followings. In a nutshell, if it weren’t already difficult to get booked in the first place when you’re just starting out, it’s just become that much harder!


From a booker’s perspective seeing as the goal of running an establishment is to make moula (again this is the music BUSINESS), the result of this is that for the few clubs that still do exist, stipulations in order to get a booking have been upped. Typically this means one of two things (neither of which are encouraging) for bands:


1) you can’t get into the venue as a new band WITHOUT paying a hefty rental fee which may prove to NOT be worth your while at all if there’s NO guarantee you will be able to at least break even through ticket sales

2) if you have NOT previously established a draw within the given touring territory of the venue in question, you will NOT be considered at all; a situation very much akin to the job search dilemma in which you can’t get a job without experience, but you surely cannot obtain any experience without first being given a shot.

While some bands are willing to go to great lengths AND empty out their pockets just to be able to put on their resumes that they rocked certain joints, considering that most musicians are on tight budgets, this isn’t the best attack strategy, in my view.

One rule of business that I learned early on from both of my entrepreneurial parents is that, “(s)he who speaks first loses.” In other words, if you put yourself out there as a band who is so desperate to play anywhere that you’re willing to be mistreated and give into unrealistic expectations just to get a gig, you are nine times out of ten gonna get screwed. Don’t kid yourself. Word gets around. If you even do this once, don’t be surprised if other venues try to pull the same routine with you.


To tie this all back to the opening story I shared, the point is that whether you find yourself playing in your friends’ backyards or renting out small unlikely spaces in order to get up and running, it really doesn’t matter. If people like your act, you’d be surprised at the places they’ll show up to in order to see you live. While these sorts of gig opportunities may not seem as “glamorous” as let’s say rocking out at Call the Office, a music venue which has housed legends, in my experience, you need to be READY and WORTHY as a band to earn such a privilege, and that doesn’t happen overnight.


Oftentimes bands (because of their egos, an issue we addressed last time) over-exaggerate their popularity in order to get booked into exclusive renowned venues, such as CTO. But when these bands don’t deliver the goods (again venues want to make money by bringing acts in), guess what? They end up getting blacklisted from ever playing at an establishment like that again (or at least for a very long time). I think it goes without saying that that is not the sort of list you ever want to find yourself a part of. Lesson of the week then: be creative, but also realistic.

Vol 4, Issue 3: “E” is for the Ego that’s Gotta Go

While upon initial consideration Tyra Banks sounds ridiculous claiming that “having the right kind of personality” is a large determinant of success in the modelling world, NOT only is she right on the money with this statement, but further, the same can be said in regard to musicians and keeping their egos in check. Case in point: the once highly sought after singer of the insanely popular tune, “Black Velvet”, pissed off one too many people, lost her record deal, and now spends her days as a permanent resident at a psychiatric institute drowning in her woes (NO joke!).

When you’re rich and famous, you’re more than welcome to add bizarre demands to your rider (like Ozzy’s 1000 brown M&Ms), and likely you’ll even get away with trashing one or two hotel rooms, but because this industry is so much about “who you know” over and above what you’ve got to offer, a bad attitude and an unwillingness to “pay your dues” from the get-go won’t get you very far.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m NOT implying that you should bend over and allow yourself to get kicked in the ass repeatedly by shady promoters who clearly are not adding any enhancement to your resume. Instead, what I’m trying to make loud and clear is that you need to at all times be respectful of your fans, the media, industry professionals, and your fellow musicians (this final category is particularly important as you never know whose act may “break”, and by keeping positive alliances with all of the bands you play with, you may just find yourself being offered the opening slot opportunity of a lifetime in the future). Further, you can’t be scared (or too up on your high-horse) to get your hands a little dirty.

One of the things that I come across far too often that drives me awol are classified ads posted by bands looking for gig opportunities as though promoters/bookers have time to scour through pages on Kijiji. Lesson #1 my friends: don’t EVER expect work to find you.

I’ve played everywhere from major festivals to bowling alleys to shopping malls and even once at a chiropractic seminar. As an aspiring rocker, you not only have to be constantly on the look-out for touring and media opportunities (online, posted on bulletin boards in music shops, through word of mouth, in magazines etc.), but further you need to take the initiative to make said opportunities become your reality. Once you’ve established a decent reputation for yourself, yes, gigs will start coming your way, but even still, a serious professional musician never stops working for themselves.

The second thing that I encounter all the time (and this to me is even further indicative of an ego issue) are musician classifieds listed right above one another where ad “A” is seeking the available musician from ad “B”, and had either taken the time to read each other’s ads, they could have connected and solved both of their problems. Again, my point is do NOT expect things to come YOUR way, without putting in a little legwork yourself. Can you imagine what would result if musicians only ever posted ads and never read any? Well, nothing – no gigs would ever occur, and certainly no bands would ever form – think about it.

The most important lesson that I want you to grasp right here and right now is this: the biggest lie the music industry has ever perpetuated onto us artists is the “myth of the overnight success”. Nobody and I mean nobody (even those who do cocaine deals in backrooms or sleep their way to the top) ever makes it without first “earning their stripes.” Please, for the sake of yourself and others, don’t resort to trying to expedite the process by partaking in either of the two aforementioned heinous acts.

Vol 4, Issue 2: Put Up Your Dukes, Let’s Get Down to It!

Like any aspiring artist, my work has been subjected both to critical review and praise. While I’ve had listeners assert that my lyrics and music espouse “universal truths” inspired by an honest “broken-hearted aesthetic”, I’ve equally been labelled “cliché” and “unoriginal”. Suffice it to say, I came to the conclusion rather quickly that it’s impossible for me (or anyone else who dares to pursue their passions in life) to please everybody.

Let it be known, I’m TOTALLY fine with this - what I’m NOT fine with, however, is the corruption involved in this process, nor the increasingly apparent decline in some sort of “standard.” Allow me to explain:

One of the more memorable moments review-wise I’ve endured in my career, was undoubtedly when I had a “journalist” (and I use that term loosely) employed by a highly regarded Canadian music magazine rip unrelentingly on my former band’s album, only to months later commend us for our “catchy” radio-worthy tracks and “edgy attitude” after being privy to one of our live performances…perhaps she had a short-term memory problem. She got paid either way though, and isn’t that what really matters? Note the sarcasm.

Beyond this, interestingly, I’ve also been educated in regard to my own biography from reading critiques of my work: apparently my “Ode to Tofu” is a sensational hit overseas, my primary musical instrument is the drums, and Alicia Keys is a huge influence of mine.


Out of these experiences I’ve learned two valuable lessons I’d like to impart onto my fellow artistic types:

1) Take ALL reviews with a grain of salt (moreover, with any insult that is hurled in one’s general direction, one should always “consider the source”).

2) DON’T submit material for review consideration. Opt for interviews instead, so at least you’ll have the opportunity to explain your work in your own words.


The aforementioned second piece of advice seemed to be working out for me just fine until I encountered the worse of them: a woman named Lisa Shea, her bevy of voluntary writers, and a website entitled, BellaOnline.

Now in my experience, those “employed” in unpaid positions typically exert less effort and said positions have high turnover rates as a consequence. Considering my experience with the well-paid “journalist” from the highly regarded Canadian publication, I’m sure you can see where I’m going with this.

While I’d rather not even honour Ms. Shea to the extent of providing full lipservice in regard to what unraveled between her/her website and my management, I will state the following:

First off, one wonders why an interview was even conducted (mind you at my management’s long distance expense) if I was going to be so terribly misquoted and misrepresented. Two, I highly recommend to her and her writers a formal review of the term “retraction”; a perusal of the ethics established by the profession of journalism couldn’t hurt either. Three, Ms. Shea could truly benefit from absorbing the full meaning of the expression, “actions speak louder than words”: while it’s all well and good to have the “About” section on your website sing to the highest hillsides of one’s commitment to objectivity and professionalism, when one refuses to remove an article that has PROVEN to contain inaccuracies (both about its subject matter and the greater subject at hand, that being music), continues to maintain SUPPORT for a writer who willingly allowed his significant other to blaspheme the subject of his piece in the public domain, and then finally, when pried, merely REPLACED the piece with another written by herself that one can fairly safely presumed was influenced by the emotion of the whole situation (the disclaimer is most telling) and CONTINUES to contain inaccuracies, it’s hard to take such claims seriously. Finally, working least in her favour, Ms. Shea made short work of relieving her writer of his position, indicating to me that clearly there must be some admission of fault on her end…and yet the review remains. But let’s get to the real topic of today’s discussion:


In this industry, as much as I hate to admit it, you will frequently encounter sketchy situations about which you’re forced to bite your tongue – not because you’re in the wrong in any regard, but because unfortunately, artists, generally speaking, have a lot LESS capital to use to hire attorneys to defend themselves should they be accused of making “slanderous” or “libelous” remarks. Though, as noted by the Canadian Bar Association, one is ONLY liable of being charged for “defamation of character/reputation” (of which slander and libel are subcategories) should their statements prove to be FALSE and deliberately MALICIOUS, when it comes to the music biz (much like any other corporately-structured industry anymore), “money talks.” Further, this entire biz is based on “appearances” and who you know. With this said, you need to know how to “pick your battles” if you wish to be able to pursue your aspirations.

In this case, I guess what I’m trying to say is that I’ve worked too damn hard to allow any “random joe” who thinks they can run a website to insult not only me and my work, but further to misrepresent me to such an extent that it could prevent music listeners from potentially giving me a chance.

In conclusion, while the internet has demonstrated itself to be an effective tool for indies in regard to having the potential opportunity to promote one’s material to a worldwide audience (for a nominal cost, too), beyond the whole illegal downloading fiasco, it clearly has many fallacies; scam artist promoters barely scratch the surface. Suffice it to say, I can now state with absolutely certainty that I fully understand exactly what my girlfriend/fellow artist Ash Keenan meant when she said that her reason for refusing to write any further music reviews was because she felt she had become “part of the problem.”


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For those interested, here’s what Ms. Shea missed by failing to conduct the interview as per the initial agreement between her writer and my management:

1) Ms. Shea’s biggest criticism of my work revolves around its lyrical content. In her view, it is cliché and underdeveloped for someone of my experience. I’d like to point out two facts one may wish to mull over when considering the validity of her argument: a) according to her biography, her background is in website/database design. Although she seems to dabble in writing, there was NO mention of her being accredited in English, Literature or Linguistics. I, other hand, minored in all three at an Ivy League university. My favourite writer is Shakespeare, and if I felt so inclined I could whip out some iambic pentameter with the best of them, but I choose NOT to with my lyrics DELIBERATELY.

Why you ask? Well, quite simply, I’m influenced by a similar notion upheld by the 60/70s pop artists when it comes to songwriting; that being to "make my art accessible to all". I intentionally keep things simplistic so that people will understand exactly what I mean. Seeing as my three main objectives as an artist are to provoke thought, be relatable, and inspire others, it wouldn’t make a whole lot of sense to write in a style that could only be appreciated by a select elite class.

Given what I’ve just said (ie: that my usage of simplistic phrasing and imagery is intentional), it’s interesting to note that Ms. Shea still managed to completely misinterpret the meaning behind several of my lyrics.

2) As per Ms. Shea’s interpretation of the following phrase from my single “Mad World” (ie: the world seems like it’s ended…when fathers subjected kids to their abuse), I’d like to clarify here that FIRST OFF this is a direct MISQUOTATION the lyric is actually "Our RELIGION has crushed down upon us when fathers subjected kids to their abuse”.

Contrary to her conclusion that this sentence is a commentary on familial relations, it is rather a discussion of the consequences that arise from certain religions, such as Catholicism, continuing to try and uphold outdated archaic practices in contemporary society (ie: disallowance of women being able to enter the priesthood, the inability of priests to marry…don’t even get me started on abortion or gay rights etc.).

To read the lyric literally without prying into said aforementioned deeper meaning, it simply can be taken as a reference to the countless cases of fathers (aka priests) subjecting children to sexual abuse and the church’s continuous attempts to cover up said scandals.

3) A similar misunderstanding revolves around the following line in the same song ("The world seems like it's ended when whores earn more than an honest day's work") While one could interpret this as a direct reference to the prostitution industry, it’s actually meant to be taken again as SOCIAL commentary on the fact that it is far more difficult to get ahead financially in contemporary society by pursuing one’s career from an honest, moral and virtuous stance – something particularly evident in the music industry.

4) I actually got my start in music when I was four. I’m a classically trained vocalist and I began writing songs when I was seven NOT in 2001 as Ms. Shea has suggested. Though HER was my first professional rock project, I’ve been involved in music in some capacity throughout my entire life.

5) In terms of the whole “homage/rip-off” debate, not only is it listed prominently on my myspace that EVERY single one of my homages on my album is DELIBERATE, but further, one with a truly well-trained musical ear and knowledge of a wide variety of genres would have been able to easily pick up on the fact that there are between one and five homages on EACH track on the album, NOT just on my song, “Don’t”.

Secondly, to compare what I did (ie: attempt to give CREDIT/RECOGNITION to all of my major artistic influences with my debut solo album by RE-CREATING in my own version ASPECTS of their melodies/lyrics) VERSUS trying to blatantly rip off the work of other artists in an attempt to pass it off as my own is simply NOT a valid argument.

My album liner notes contain the names of ALL the artists whose work I drew upon; moreover, I’ve welcomed every single one of those artists to listen to my tracks and have received POSITIVE feedback from THEM DIRECTLY regarding this idea.

6) As for the production quality of my recording, again I’d like to call upon Ms. Shea’s credentials, which to my knowledge, do NOT consist of any background in audio recording technology. Had an interview been completed as promised, I would have been able to explain the intention of making my album come across as organic as possible.

ALL of the tracks were played live (vocals/guitar simultaneously) and the occasional vocal crack, or flubbed note was again INTENTIONALLY left in the mix as in my view, no artist should ever aspire to achieve perfection, but rather something genuinely imperfect that reflects them in their raw inspired emotional state.

7) Finally, the aspect I find most disturbing about this review is the fact that it seems as though Ms. Shea has fairly established views of what specific genres should and should not sound like and should and should not do. If I can’t be creative and challenge myself along with convention through an artform, where the hell can I? I rest my case.

Vol 3, The Grand Finale: A Few Parting Words & Pieces of Advice

Well my friends, it has come to that time of year again when we are forced to say goodbye, but unlike previous years, we will NOT be reacquainted come September. After three years of providing you all with advice and insight based on my experiences in the music biz, along, of course, with the occasional rant, I’ve come to the decision that, like so many great artists of the past, it is “better to burn out than fade away.” With that said however, there’s no need to despair, as I promise you that all of my articles will remain accessible (in full) online (right here under your pretty little nose!), and anytime you wish to field questions my way via email, I’ll be more than happy to respond.

In what seems like a short time together, we’ve covered everything from finding the right bandmates, to booking your first gig, to generating press coverage, to music piracy, to album sales certification, to Canada’s grant associations, and even drug use and sexism in the music biz. I’ve done my best to answer all of the questions that I once had when I first began my musical journey as a wide-eyed naïve 15 year old with rockstar aspirations. It only seems appropriate, as I lay my column down to rest, to revisit some of the initial pieces of advice that I offered in “So You Wanna be in a Rock Band?’s” very first issue. I feel these words hold just as much, if not more, truth today than they did when I initially wrote them. So, if you truly wanna be in a rock band, I suggest that you take them to heart.

In the words of one highly respected industry expert with whom I had the pleasure of speaking earlier this year, “the world doesn’t owe you anything, and being a musician is supposed to be hard. If your stuff isn't good enough, or if the public chooses not to like it, there's nothing you can do about it,” (Alan Cross).

1) There is no such thing as an educational program that can ever prepare you for the harsh reality of how the music industry actually functions.

2) You may be the greatest innovator and songwriter since John Lennon, but if you can't sell 10,000 CDs without label support, good luck and God-speed.

3) If you want to be successful on any level in the music biz, the first thing you need to realize is that NO ONE, and I mean no one, will work harder than you on promoting your music and/or band. So, if you don't have much of a work ethic, I suggest you pursue other interests.

4) One of the biggest misconceptions about the music industry is that once you are signed, your work ends. Wrong....it only gets harder, because now you are competing in the big leagues with bands who are not only signed, but have full time publicists and booking agents working around the clock to get their name out there. Oh wait... I'm sure you thought that a label would provide you with a booking agent and publicist once you signed a contract with them right? Wrong again!

5) If you think that being a musician will lead to immediate gratification and financial remuneration, you couldn't be more off, especially if you are an original act. Believe it or not, in general, cover and tribute acts (without representation) are compensated about 10 times that of an original act for a single show.

6) Further on the subject of making money…in order to attain a position of financial and career stability (of course, it can never be entirely stable), musicians often work for 10 - 15 years and then finally, just when they think they've had enough, they break. In other words, there is NO such thing as an “overnight success”.

7) There is always the risk of becoming a one- hit-wonder. Labels, plain and simply, just want to make money, and musicians are a dime-a -dozen. Don't think for a second that they care about your integrity, dignity, or the longevity of your career. If a label can make the most profit off of one single, than that is the route they will take.

8) The word "fair" does not exist in this industry, nor does "honesty." Promises are broken everyday, and as I said before, I cannot stress enough how important it is to realize that the music industry functions as any big business.

9) If you are not marketable, you will not be successful. Music industry execs don't want to take risks with something that may or may not sell. Hence, the reason why you see trends constantly regurgitated, and why next to every band on the radio sounds the same.

And finally… and MOST IMPORTANTLY!!!!

10) Please, if you wanna be in a rock band, do it for the right reasons: a love of music, because you want to inspire others, or so that you can act as a positive rolemodel for future generations.

I wish you all the best of luck in your musical journeys, and remember, music saves lives.

About the Author:

Rose Cora Perry is the former frontwoman of Canadian hard rock bands ANTI-HERO & HER, as well as the sole owner and operator of HER Records, a management company in which she offers marketing, promotion, publicity, tour booking, and artist development services for female rock musicians.

Her bands toured extensively across North America playing notable festivals such as Warped Tour, Canadian Music Week, NorthbyNorthEast, Wakefest, and MEANYFest, and achieved label status.

Voted “Best Rock Act of the Year” by numerous industry publications, ANTI-HERO's critically acclaimed debut album, "Unpretty" is available worldwide for purchase. Rose Cora Perry is a dedicated promoter of D.I.Y. ethics, and an avid supporter of independent musicians.